Photos of Fantazy Land in Alexandria, Egypt–the worst theme park in the world.

An article about the legal implications of the word fuck. Via BoingBoing.

Here’s an extreme rock paper scissors variant with 15 hand gestures that I would be willing to play. The same guy also has come up with a 25 hand gesture variant with over 300 possible non-tie outcomes and only a four percent chance for a tie. Via BoingBoing.

Nothing is scarier than clowns, except maybe a baby Ronald McDonald clown.

No, I am not going to blog about the Gordon Getty, or San Francisco’s old money. I want to promote an essay I read about the U.S. Bureau of Engraving and Printing’s decision to make paper money a “showcase for art” back in 1886. It is a well written essay about the beauty of paper money for a decade between 1886 and 1896. The essay is filled with amazing images of paper currency from the period.

The only problem I have with the essay is that it mistakenly calls all the people depicted on paper money “dead presidents.” This “dead presidents” myth is perpetuated by rap music and pervasive slang. But let’s not forget that Alexander Hamilton, depicted on the $10 bill, was Secretary of the Treasury and never a president. Also Benjamin Franklin, depicted on the $100 bill, was never a president.

Although Franklin was an influencer and a politician, the only executive branch position he held was as a member of the first presidential cabinet with the title of Postmaster General, an honorary and now defunct cabinet position that required little to no responsibility. Franklin would later become an early governor of Pennsylvania with the title of President of the Supreme Executive Council of Pennsylvania.

So when you are humming along to “It’s All About the Benjamins” remember that Benjamin Franklin is not a dead president. He’s actually a “dead rich white guy,” a more accurate term but admittedly not as catchy.

“Hello I am Martin I have 21 anuses and alive in Madrid gustaria me toknow women with desire to pass good moments, I have good sense ofhumor, am trigueno green eyes, deportista and equipped verywell.”
–Martin of Madrid, Spain in June 2005 Wikilist.net Personals Posting

This poor schlub wrote something semi-seductive in Spanish and used an automatic English translator to post it to an online forum. Sadly the title of his post turned into “Male, ninato 21 anuses equipped.” Wow, 21 anuses equipped!? Say it ain’t so–that’s so sexy! I am sure the women are lining up to contact this guy. Also he’s looking for women with desire to “pass good moments.” Pass good moments? Isn’t that a euphemism for having healthy bowel movements? That’s just sick!

Ladies, if you keep giving guys like this the opportunity to show you their 21 anuses or watch you have healthy bowel movements you are just encouraging more ridiculous posts like these. On second thought, these are so funny that it may be worth searching Google for “18 anuses”, “19 anuses”, and “20 anuses” just to see what these young “anuses” are posting online in their futile search for international online love.

A Philadelphia man plead guilty today to weapons of mass destruction charges for sending a mail bomb to a Chicago surgeon he said botched his penile enlargement surgery. The man was “extremely unhappy with the results.” I’ll say, unhappy enough to blow someone up! Still, a weapon of mass destruction charge seems harsh for this crime. He is guilty of sending explosives through the U.S. mail, but it is clear that he doesn’t have a weapon of mass destruction. I think that’s why he wanted the surgery in the first place.

Ninjas seem to be everywhere these days. A group of kids from the LBC and Costa Mesa called the EMC Monkeys are training to be ninjas together and putting together videos of their exploits. Check out this video of one of their lead members, Xin Sarith Azuma Phan Wuku, it’s awesome! If these guys decide to go full ninja style and kill people we’re all doomed. Their website says that they are “for hire” so it’s only a matter of time. May God help us all.

I remember going to this site years ago and there were about half the number of games than there are on it now. Some of the games on the site are really good, and addicting. A good diversion when you have the time. Enjoy.

Spam subject line writers sometimes translate Chinese menus. Via Memepool.

William Shatner went where “no man has gone before” today by selling his own kidney stone to a casino for $25,000 then donating the proceeds to Habitat for Humanity. GoldenPalace.com, the same casino that bought a piece of toast with the image of the Virgin Mary in 2004, bought the kidney stone for $25,000 after Shatner rejected their initial offer of $10,000. Oh, how I wish I could sell any bodily function for just $1, let alone $25,000! This is reason number 1,242 of why it’s cool to be Kirk.

A 69-year-old bowler in Michigan dropped dead immediately after bowling 300 for the third time in his life. I guess his heart just couldn’t take the excitement. His friends said that, “If he could have written a way to go out, this would be it.” That’s definitely a dramatic way to go! Rest in peace, Ed.

A cop in Michigan used his taser on his partner over an argument over whether to stop at a store to buy a soda. The cop, who was in the passenger seat, apparently tried to struggle with his partner for the wheel before using his taser on her leg. Crazy.

A man is seeking $30,000 in punitive damages from his ex-girlfriend for, get this, supergluing his genitals to his abdomen. Huh? Here’s the whole story. The guy contends that his ex-girlfriend invited him over to her home on May 7, 2000, where he fell asleep. He woke up to find that she had used Crazy Glue to stick his genitals to his abdomen, glued his buttocks together and spelled out a profanity on his back in nail polish. I mean they don’t call it “Crazy Glue” for nothing. Adding insult to injury, she made him walk a mile to a gas station to call for help–apparently she would not let him use her phone.

She told him that it was payback for their breakup. He pressed charges and she pleaded guilty to misdemeanor assault and served six months’ probation. Now, I guess the mental anguish of the incident is causing him to seek monetary damages. Damn, this guy was seriously punked and is probably lucky to be alive. Because chances are that if you can Crazy Glue a penis you possibly have enough crazy in you to stab somebody. He should have let sleeping dogs lie, because now that this is public he’ll never live this down.

I am not really sure how I missed this bit of news from a few weeks ago, here’s the excerpt:

Petronela Brandus, 24, has become the latest “body cavity phone blagger” to have her collar felt after police stopped the suspected thief as she got off a bus in Iasi. Passengers had apparently seen the 24-year-old lift the device, but cops could find no trace of it.

In the time-honoured fashion, they then rang the number and heard the tell-tale sound of internal phone action. In this case, however, Brandus had not gone for the relatively-simple vaginal option, but rather the less convenient back passage route.

Why not turn off the phone? Well, apparently almost everyone in Europe uses PINs to lock their phones on power-up. If the thief had turned the phone off she wouldn’t have been able to use it. Surely putting it on vibrate should have been an option for her.

Either way though, the cops would have probably “felt” the vibration. However, the most impressive part of the story is that the phone’s owner accepted the phone back after it was “sprayed with disinfectant.” No way! After being in someone’s “back passage” they can keep it.

The world needs a Hello Kitty Fire Extinguisher, it’s for those “cute” fires. When you follow the link, read the comments on the page. One reader stated, “you’d die laughing if someone ran at you with [this], even if you were on fire…”

Security Checkpoing Toy

It’s fun to prentend to be an airport security tard, er, guard! Teach ’em to be afraid while they’re still young with this wonderful toy. Your tot will have hours upon hours of enjoyment in running plastic luggage through an x-ray machine that doesn’t even work, just like the real thing! And a hand scanner is also included to add an element of romance! What are you waiting for? Go on Amazon.com and buy one today!

I can’t believe that this toy actually exists, but it does and it really is available on Amazon.com. The Amazon page gives this safety information: “WARNING: Choking Hazard – Small parts. Not for children under 3 years.” I think what it should say is “WARNING: Children may experience temporary mental impairment while impersonating airport security. Long term emotional damage to children from the use of the product is not yet known.” Big ups to BoingBoing.net for the link.

Tiger Threat

A seventeen-year-old girl was attacked and killed by a seven-year-old bengal tiger while posing for a senior photograph at an animal sanctuary in Kansas. Damn, that sentence is strange, because, well, who the hell poses for senior pictures with a freakin’ tiger!? Unless you joined the circus, work in a zoo, or personally know Siegfried and Roy you shouldn’t be taking pictures with tigers. It’s just not a good idea. The tiger pictured here isn’t the one that killed the girl, but this trainer certainly looks like he has a death wish. Stop the insanity people!

Damn, I was searching through Wikipedia reading random entries when the entry for Frank Chu came up. I was shocked that my boy Frank was on Wikipedia. Even more shocking was the fact that the entry pointed to the pictures that I took of Frank four years ago. Talk about random.

Actually, not only did the dog finish, the dog placed 72nd, ahead of hundreds of humans in a field of about 500 swimmers. The swim, which starts in Alcatraz and finishes at shoreline near the Hyde Street Pier, is about 1.2 miles in length through the frigid waters of the San Francisco Bay. The race is sponsored and organized by the South End Rowing Club, which prides itself on swimming the race without wetsuits. Wow.

A cinematography skydiver named Albert “Gus” Wing III was killed on Saturday when he was struck by–wait for it–that’s right, a wing! After opening his parachute the plane that he had just jumped out of with thirteen other skydivers struck him (with the wing) severing his legs at the knees. The guy survives the collision but dies from his injuries at the hospital later that day. Coincidence? A guy named Wing, first of all, ends up being a professional skydiver. And one day, in a seemingly routine dive, Mr. Wing is killed by well, a wing.

Maybe this is irony more than coincidence, but coincidence is a funny thing.

This is explained in the opening prologue of Paul Thomas Anderson’s film, “Magnolia.” The narrator guides the audience through several unlikely scenarios of chance and coincidence that display, with great humor, how past relevance can intrude on the present. In one scenario, a man plummets off the side of a building in a suicide attempt, but is inflicted with a shotgun blast on his way to landing in a net that would have surely saved his life. The shotgun was fired by his mother from an apartment several floors below. With shotgun cocked, she was violently threatening her husband when the weapon accidentally fired and struck their son on his descent. To her knowledge the gun was never loaded. Coincidentally, it was the suicide “victim” that had loaded the weapon a few weeks prior hoping that it would end his his parents’ years of fighting. The narrator tells us “these strange things happen all the time.”

The only thing that would make this incident, the wing incident, as coincidental as the one in the film would be if Mr. Wing was killed for giving the pilot a strong sedative from his bag earlier that morning that he mistook for a pain killer because his wife changed the containers in his bag in an attempt to be helpful but accidentally forgot to tell him. Or “something” like that, but we may never know it. Either way, life always finds a way to be stranger than fiction.

In China, an online video game player was stabbed and killed by another over a dispute over a virtual sword. Apparently, the sword was lent to the victim and he then sold it for $870 without informing the other guy. When the other guy found out about the sale, he went to the police to report the “theft.” However, there are no laws for virtual theft in China or elsewhere for that matter. The victim promised to pay the guy back, but he didn’t pay it back fast enough. After running out of patience the wronged gamer stabbed and killed him. You can’t make this stuff up!

In Michigan, a cat shot his owner by knocking down a 9mm handgun off a kitchen counter. The gun discharged and shot him in the ass, hmmn, the lower torso. I guess the cat was pissed that the owner wasn’t cleaning his litter box.

All the hype around Live Strong bracelets has sparked many imposters. They’ve turned up in Oregon, where very similar yellow “Live Long” bracelets have appeared in stores. I am surprised that a “Die Weak” band hasn’t been put on the market. Well, just in the last week, the dieweak.com domain has been registered. I know a couple of people cynical enough to buy a “Die Weak” band. Because hey, only two things are certain in life, death and taxes.

Crazy Ass Hoe

What happens when storm weary Floridians snap? A woman from St. Augustine Florida ran over two teenage boys after they accidentally hit her car with a golf ball on Sunday afternoon. According to police, the teenagers were bouncing a golf ball in a parking lot when it accidentally went astray and struck the woman’s car. Since the car was not damaged, the boys apologized and turned away. The woman then started to drive away, but suddenly made a U-turn, ran over a median and struck the teens before knocking over a light pole. She then allegedly went after a third boy, but did not hit him.

According to witnesses, after all this she got out of her car and started smoking a cigarette “like a movie star.” Right, like a like a really crappy straight-to-trailer-home-video movie. As of Monday, one of the boys was in critical condition. When the woman appeared in front of the judge she told him she had mental problems, which probably explains the Cousin It style she is sporting (see photo). She is, deservedly, being held without bail. Crazy bitch.

New York’s Algonquin Hotel is offering a $10,000 martini on their menu that has a loose diamond at the bottom of it. Although nobody has purchased the martini, the hotel is hoping that a hopeless romantic will someday take the plunge. Ordering the drink requires three-day notice to pick out the gem that will be at the bottom. Only in America.

Virgin Sandwich

A woman in Miami put up half of a 10-year-old grilled cheese sandwich for sale on eBay and claimed it bore the image of the Virgin Mary. Even more astounding, the sale was viewed over 100,000 times and garnered a bid of $22,000 before eBay pulled it off the site. The woman said she took a bite after making it 10 years ago and saw a face staring back at her from the bread. She put the sandwich in a clear plastic box with cotton balls and kept it on her night stand. The sandwich has never sprouted a spore of mold.

It is a sad state of affairs when people believe that they see the divine in food. Well, I guess when I eat a delicious In-n-Out Burger I feel like I am almost talking to God, but that’s not exactly the same thing. Selling a half-eaten sandwich on Ebay is not only only gross, but a whole lot of crazy. I certainly hope that this woman uses her proceeds from the sale, if any, to get the professional help she needs. Big ups to Steve Thompson for sending me the story.

An 11-year-old girl was suspended from school when she ignored teachers that told her she couldn’t do cartwheels and handstands at lunch time. Meanwhile students are allowed to play basketball and football. Give me a break! Yeah, let’s stop kids from exercising altogether and let’s all be morbidly obese together. That’s a great idea!

As seen on Memepool, this site shows what appears to be a reality show in which Japanese girls agree to bitchslap the shit out of each other. The reason why they slap each other isn’t really explained, except that possibly the host of the show is asking them to do it. However, one thing is certain, some of these girls are releasing pent up anger. I also find it really funny that they all fix their hair after each smackdown. It’s like a train wreck–check it out.

A Florida man was walking his dog when a gator jumped out of a pond and bit the dog in the head. As the gator was pulling the dog back the man jumped in the pond, pulled out a pocket knife, and stabbed the gator in the eye! Luckily, the dog and the man got out with a couple of bite and scratch marks. You just can’t make this stuff up!

The Lance Armstrong Foundation has run out of Live Strong bracelets on their website. You used to be able to buy the bracelets in packs of 10, 100, or 1,200 from the site earlier this year $1 apiece. Now the bracelets are going for about $5 each on Ebay. I wish I would have known this. I would have bought a $1,200 case in a heartbeat if I knew I could auction them off at $5+ a pop! There are people out there making a grip on these things.

Update (8/31/2004): Vote on this volatile topic here.

I sat down and watched a little live TV last night. This is something I haven’t done for a long time, especially after getting Tivo, but that’s another story. Since I wasn’t fast forwading the TV commercials, I came across this ad for Levitra which featured a good looking woman, possibly in her mid-thirties, starting off with “Can I tell you a secret? My man takes Levitra.”

She goes on to say that it gives him the “quality response he needs.” So I assume quality response means a quality hard on. Okay. It all sounds fine and dandy until the voice over at the end reads off a whole bunch of crap, finishing with “In the rare case that an erection lasts more than four hours, seek immediate medical attention.” Yeah, that’ll make you take notice–I almost fell out of my chair laughing.

So, it’s obvious that they are trying to market hard-on pills for recreational use now. I wonder how long it will take for the “four hour hard-on” to become a part of American pop culture. It’s only a matter of time.

As seen on Memepool, the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) warns, “Many farm workers have died after entering manure pits.” Apparently the gases from the manure pit can be “oxygen-deficient, toxic and/or explosive” and can cause suffocation. Such a tough way to go, passing out and then drowning in shit.

Who knew that filming a Winnebago Commercial was so fucking hard? This made me laugh so hard I almost fell out of my chair! Big ups to Memepool.

As seen in Memepool, see how well you can identify harmless dog toys from marital aids (you know, dildos) in this quiz.

You just can’t make this shit up. Judge Donald Thompson frequently masturbated and used a device for enhancing erections while his court was in session, charges a petition by the state’s attorney general seeking his removal. I won’t mention the location, you can read the article yourself.

CourtTV revealed today that Michael Jackson paid $23 million to his 1993 accuser. Court papers claim that Jackson paid the monetary sum for “alleged negligence” connected to the case. This new development could prove to be devastating to Jackson should the accuser, now an adult, decide to take the stand.

In a surprise move, Jackson’s legal team filed a $5 billion lawsuit in U.S. District Court against Satan, the “Prince of Darkness.” Court documents show that Jackson is suing Satan using his legal name, Lucifer, and 5 of his known aliases for breach of contract and seeks immediate injunctive relief from Satan’s oppression. Jackson’s lead attorney stated, “We know Satan can be a slippery character. He has an amazing defense team and we didn’t want him to get off on some technicality–we have all of our bases covered.”

The suit argues that Jackson entered into contract with Satan shortly before the release of his Off the Wall album. The contract with Satan should have enabled Jackson to “play with children forever, be the richest star on the planet, and become white.” Jackson argues that although he has achieved immortality he has developed an unsatiable affinity for young boys, which was not specified in the contract. It also states that he was the richest pop star in the world for only a few years and now cannot sell a song to “save his life.” Additionally, Jackson argues that although he has become white, he has lost his nose in the laborious process making him look like the host of Tales from the Crypt. Jackson’s lead attorney added, “We would like the immortality clause stricken from the contract. If we lose the ongoing criminal case and obtain a life sentence it could be devastating to our client. You know, living forever behind bars would be bad.”

A spokesperson for Satan stated, “Our contracts are iron-clad. We have been in business for over ten thousand years and feel confident about a favorable outcome for our client and his associates.” Satan could not be reached directly for comment, but sources state that he was heard laughing his ass off in the shadows while we interviewed Jackson’s legal team.

A judge is scheduled to rule on the injunctive relief early next month. Satan’s attorneys are expected to file a change of venue request in an effort to move the case from Los Angeles to Hades, which some of our sources say is located near Temecula, CA. These motions could set an important legal precedent for cases against Satan and his company, Diablo Associates, which are located on prestigious Riverfront Drive on the River Styx in Hades.

When hearing of the suit between the “King of Pop” and the “Prince of Darkness,” many Jackson fans stood outside of the courthouse chanting “The King Will Beat the Prince, The King Will Beat the Prince!” A priest witnessing the large demonstration stated, “the world is filled with misguided souls.” Amen.

Big Hairy Armpit  The Axe Effect

Apparently women like armpits. Giant armpits with small stubbby feet that are about the size of St. Bernard wiht no head and no arms. Huh? Did the people creating these ads realize that the armpit really looks like a giant hairy dickless crotch with feet?

The ad slogan is “Dry Pits Win,” but at what cost? The self-esteem of young men all over the country. Women only want guys for their pits apparently. According to Mark Morford, the message of the ad is simple, “Your chick is not really dating you, dumbass. She is dating your [dry] giant hairy armpit. This is all she really cares about.”

Geez, what is the world coming to? If big hairy dry armpits win, then we all lose. Well, I don’t know what that really means, but it sounds good. Big ups to Mark Morford for writing another hilarious column–I had no idea these ads existed.

I know this was already on memepool, but I just had to post it here because it is crazy funny–the Rumsfeld Fighting Techniques. People may want him to step down from his post as Secretary of Defense, but they can’t beat his Kung Fu.

Alligator Boy and His Mom

A 12-year-old boy in Deltona, Florida, just north of Orlando, survived an alligator attack by punching the alligator in the nose. The official story is that the boy was swimming, minding his own business, when the alligator attacked him by biting him in the head, but other sources close to the incident tell another tale of suburban gang bravado.

The boy (pictured here with his mom) was sitting on the side of the lake when the alligator swam up. The alligator, seeing the boy, nodded his head, the universal symbol for “what set you from, beatch!” The boy, a prominent member of the Lakeside Crips, quickly recognized the alligator as “Smiley,” the leader of the Alligator Pirus, an enemy suburban Blood gang.

The alligator’s red bandana was tied to his tail as he waved it in the air inviting the boy to jump in for a beatdown. The boy left his weapon of choice, a 9mm Glock handgun, on the shore and jumped in for a “mano-a-mano” battle. He knew that a Glock in the hands of one the Alligator Pyroos would seal the fate of his entire gang, consisting of himself and six other kids from Crabtree Street.

Once in the water, the boy proceeded to wrestle Smiley, kicking him in the ribcage. Smiley was too fast for him though, he spun around a couple of times and locked his jaw around the boys head. But the young thug had heart, he punched Smiley with all his might, freeing himself. Smiley swallowed the boy’s ear in delight and swam away on his back while throwing up gang signs.

The boy got out of the water, picked up his gun, and ran to a neighbor’s house for a trip to the hospital. “You win some you lose some, ya know. That alligator bitch is gonna get his though, forreal, belie’ dat! Ma moms and I are goin’ gator huntin’ tonight!” From the looks of this picture, Smiley better run!

A man in New Jersey asked for a job application at a Catholic elementary school and when they denied his request he took a dump in a diaper and left it at the school! You just can’t make this stuff up!

While we’re on the subject, check out this website for “adults who enjoy wearing diapers, plastic pants, rubber pants and other big baby clothing,” it’s scary.

X-Ray of Coins in Man's Belly

Well, I’ve heard “an apple a day keeps the doctor away,” but a coin a day just kills your ass eventually. An elderly man walked into a French hospital in 2002 complaining of stomach aches and no bowel movements when doctors took an x-ray and found 12 pounds of coins, necklaces, and needles valued at over $650. Doctors immediately opened the man to remove the coins, but he died days later of complications.

His family conceded that the man suffered from mental illness and had been known to eat coins in the past, coins he usually stole from people he visited. The condition is known as “pica,” Latin for magpie. Regardless, eating hundreds of coins is just plain weird. Why is this important now? Well, the case study was just published in the New England Journal of Medicine.

This story was actually a link from CNN’s front page. Can you say slow news day? Anyway, after 43 years of being an item and taking the lead from Ben and JLo, Barbie and Ken are finally breaking up. Oddly, the article says nothing about Ken being openly gay.

In an unscrupulous attempt to wield incredible power and enslave the minions of Earth, Microsoft sued a 17-year-old Canadian kid named Mike Rowe for registering his own domain name, mikerowesoft.com. When confronted by the press Bill Gates offered this explanation, “Our domain, Microsoft, was forged in the depths of Mt. Rainier, and we were assured by the elves–or was it the lawyers, I can’t remember–that we had ‘one domain to rule them all.’ Besides, there’s nothing funnier than crying Canadians!” Oh, hell no! That’s bullshit! I would love for this kid to win the lawsuit and would donate to his cause, if he ever gets his website back up.

World's Largest Snake, Associated Press

The world’s largest snake was caught in Indonesia a few days ago. Indonesian villagers caught a 49-foot, 983 pound reticulated python and it is in captivity at a primitive zoo in Curugsewu village in the country’s main island of Java. Wow!

Update: According to Snopes, and many others, this story is false.

I don’t know how I missed this little news story from a few weeks ago, but it is still very blogworthy. It seems that residents of a city called Freetown, in the African country of Sierra Leone, rioted earlier this month when a duo of popular dwarf comedians were substituted by another pair of funny dwarves.

Let me get this straight. Pay to watch two funny dwarves, the wrong dwarves show up, and decide to riot and destroy the stadium. Nice move. Maybe the most amazing part of the story is that the fucking dwarves sold a stadium full of tickets! The moral of the story: you can’t switch dwarves midstream.

A man described as a “popular karaoke performer” was seriously injured when his wife attempted to cut his penis off with a razor blade as he slept. The fight stemmed from the man’s popularity as a performer, apparently he was friendly with the ladies. He is expected to make a full recovery from his injuries, but authorities stated that had his wife used scissors, he would have not fared so well. She is still at large.

Even more disturbing, the article states that in August a man was allegedly killed by his wife in retribution for beating her. She squeezed his testicles until he fainted and then tied his neck to a bed with a scarf. That’s a movie of the week!

In stark contrast to cutting penises and squeezing testicles, check out the new penis enlargement patch. Yeah, like the ones smokers wear to quit smoking, but for guys with small artillery. And of course, with testimonials from models, it’s gotta work! Jeez, what the hell is the world coming to!?

A man on a commuter train leaving Grand Central Station pissed off everyone on the train because of his cell phone. Was he talking at the top of his lungs? No, not exactly. He dropped his cell phone into the train’s toilet and proceeded to stick his hand into the toilet in search of his phone–he got stuck. Authorities had to use the “jaws of life” to get him out.

“The toilets are aluminum so I imagine he was down on hands and knees with his shirt rolled up and hand and arm down inside, trying to flush out his cell phone.”
–Jim Cameron of the Connecticut Metro-North commuter council.

I think it’s safe to say that if you drop your phone into a toilet and you don’t see it, it’s the toilet’s phone. Your relationship with the phone is officially over. Deal with it. This is another reason to stick with the free phones that come with cell phone service and not buy the latest $500 phone. Although, I doubt that even a $500 price tag would encourage me to embark in a toilet search and rescue.

Edwin Gallard, 41, of New York, is never going to live this down.

This guy from the Netherlands made a flash animation about the end of the world from California’s point of view. It’s pretty funny, check it out if you have the chance. And be sure to turn your speakers up so you can hear his accent. Big ups to Maria Labos for sending me the link.

The owners of a 7-Eleven in Santa Clara were happy to receive the $250,000 commission from selling a winning lottery ticket in the store. But they were even more stoked to find out they themselves had bought the winning ticket. The couple, who have owned the store for over 16 years, is now $49.7 million richer. Amazingly, they said during a press conference that they plan to continue to run their store and will also continue to buy lottery tickets.