Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, has been deemed the “testicle bomber” or “ball bomber” due to this Reuters article quote:

…the device consisted of a six-inch (15.25 cm) packet of powder and a syringe containing a liquid, which were sewn into the suspect’s underwear so they would be near his testicles and unlikely to be detected.

I mean this guy literally tried to blow his balls off! “Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!!!”

You would think that terrorists around the world know that after United 93 if you try and act a fool on a plane, your fellow passengers will beat your ass first and ask questions later. Especially American passengers. We have a lot of pent up rage in this country and peeps are just looking for an excuse to kick some ass, and to do it with a legitimate reason is just icing on the proverbial cake.

First, Richard Reid, the shoe bomber, tried to light his kicks on fire just a few months after 9/11 and got his ass beat which is termed “subdued” in news reports. Subdued means you got your ass beat. In 2007, a passenger tried to open a plane’s cockpit door and he got his ass beat and duct taped to a seat. But these incidents are ancient history, here are some that happened just this year. In January, a guy yelled “I’ve got a bomb” as a plane was landing at LAX and got his ass beat before the plane even touched the ground. In April, another guy tried to open a cockpit door on a flight to Israel (!) and he got his ass beat. In August, this guy punched a woman in the face then took off all his clothes on a flight from Oakland to (not returning from) Las Vegas. Needless to say he got his ass beat.

Basically, if you even remotely look like you are going to act up on a plane you are getting your ass beat, Fight Club style.

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