A man was arrested in West Virginia for DUI and charged with assault for “farting in the officer’s general direction.”  According to the police report, this guy allegedly “lifted his leg and passed gas loudly” on said cop and “then fanned the air with his hand in front of his rear onto the cop.”  Who knew that cops in West Virginia were so sensitive!?  The complaint filed by the cop goes on to say, “The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature.”

Created contact!  Now that’s a fart ladies and gentlemen!  Bravo!  Bravo!!!

Wow, this cop is lucky he didn’t go camping us back in high school.  It’s one thing to get a whiff of a really good one out in the open, but to be enclosed in a tent with the fart, that’s special.  I have some high school friends that were scarred for life.  I am sure they remember, unless they were so traumatized that they blocked the memory.  You know who you are.

P.S. Thanks for not pressing assault charges against me guys, jeez!

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