Team Guido Eliminated

In this double-sized episode, teams had to make their way from Zanzibar to Poland. All of the teams were given tickets on a flight that landed in Poland the next morning at 11:25AM. This was quite an equalizer. Some teams were at the travel agency for about four hours trying to book better flights. Amazingly, Team Guido left the Pit Stop almost a full 15 hours behind the first place team.

Luckily for them, Eric & Danielle were unable to book flights earlier than their pre-arranged flight. Those two teams were tied for last place. In Kilimanjaro, they missed their connecting flight and fell even further behind the other teams. Teams fell so far behind in fact that in the following leg teams started the next leg before those two teams even finished.

Team Guido took a long time in performing the Detour and were marked for elimination heading into the next leg. This pretty much sealed their fate, as Eric & Danielle simply needed to keep up with the Guidos to beat them because of the thirty minute penalty that they would incur at the end of the subsequent leg.

Here are the highlights from this double-legged episode:

  • The producers of the race actually played circus music when Charla & Mirna started the race. Pretty funny. This still doesn’t explain why Charla & Mirna talk to every foreigner they meet in a condescending Italian-like accent, which is interesting because they’re Armenian not Italian! WTF!?
  • “We’re going to see Chopin play piano” exclaimed Dustin. Kandice then asked “for real!?” And then Dustin actually had to explain “well no, he’s dead!” Sometime Kandice is way too blonde for her own good. I am starting to lose faith in the Beauty Queens.
  • Mirna was wearing a shirt under her sweater that read “This is what a ‘c’ looks like” the word that started with the letter ‘c’ was cutoff, but I can only think of one ‘c’ word that Mirna looks like.
  • Joe from Team Guido had a breakdown in Kilimanjaro where he literally tried to scream at a plane that was sitting on the tarmac. It was hilarious. Bill actually said about his partner “I think he’s lost it.”
  • “You like Polish hot dogs, you like Polish sausage” asked Charla & Mirna of their taxi driver in their condescending Italian-like accent. The taxi driver didn’t respond and simply thought of throwing them out of his car at high speed. But there was a cameraman with them.
  • “Sounds good to me” said Mirna at the piano tuning Detour, as if she simply saying that in her fake accent would be enough to influence the outcome and get her a clue. I think she thinks that her fake accent is like a Jedi mind trick or something.
  • Eric antagonized his “girlfriend” Danielle by not buying her a cup of coffee before the bus trip to Auschwitz by claiming that they had to save money for the leg. This was totally uncalled for. He must be gay! What a dick!
  • Teams went to Auschwitz and they had to read a passage to commemorate those that died there. I found it interesting that the only teams that choked up where the gay teams and Uchenna & Joyce, since they can understand prejudice better than the other teams.
  • “You have to eat 24 inches” said Eric to Danielle, knowing damn well that he’s eaten more inches than that in his lifetime. I am talking about sausage of course.
  • “Ladies and gentlemen, Miss California!” said Eric of Dustin after she barfed up some sausage.
  • Charla barfed sausage into a bucket with so much gusto that it was frightening. As she pulled her head out of the bucket, she had vomit on her lip (!) and I almost lost it in my living room.
  • Mirna is a manipulative bitch that can’t be trusted. She actually started crying to a taxi driver that demanded $100 from her to show her the way to their next destination. The taxi driver finally realized that it was all bullshit and left her stranded. Awesome.
  • Charla fell flat on her face, not once but twice, while leading a horse at the Roadblock. Mirna must have a sadistic side to make Charla do this task. Luckily, it’s really hard to get hurt while wearing metal armor.
  • Episode Stats

    Detour: Perfect Pitch or Perfect Angle. In Perfect Pitch, teams needed to tune a piano to get their next clue. In Perfect Angle, teams needed to x-ray a mannequin to find a hidden clue.

    Fast Forward: Joined teams had to climb two towers. As they climbed, they had to count the stairs and calculate the total number of steps in both towers. Uchenna & Joyce and Oswald & Danny performed the Fast Forward successfully.

    Intersection: Eat it Up. Two teams joined together to make kielbasa sausage and eat 24 inches of sausage per person.

    Roadblock: One Team member had to don a full suit of authentic medieval armor and lead a horse half a mile through the forest to the castle gates.

    Yield: None.

    Pit Stop: Warsaw, Poland.

    Smartest Play: The Beauty Queens finding the earliest flight to Poland.

    Dumbest Play: Team Guido taking so many x-rays to complete the Perfect Angle Detour.

    Balls of the Week: Charla leading a huge horse down a path while wearing metal armor.

    Funniest Moment: When Charla, wearing metal armor, face planted twice while leading a horse to the castle gates.

    Pick to Win: The Beauty Queens (Currently in 3rd Place)

    Next to Be Eliminated: Charla & Mirna.

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