Boricuas Eliminated

In this episode, teams continued the leg from the mat and headed from Moscow, Russia to Stuttgart, Germany. Surprisingly, the Old Farts are still well in the race. The teams that chose to wash the trolleys were definitely trailing near the end of the pack. And as I predicted, the Nerds were pulling up the rear.

The best news for this episode, the teams didn’t all bunch up at the airport. Three teams: the Jocks, the Nutty Dentist, and the Hippies, made it out of Moscow the same night as they touched the mat. All of the other teams had to wait until the following morning to catch flights out of Moscow, putting them 10-12 hours behind the lead teams.

The test drive at the Mercedes-Benz factory looked sweet! Teams were driven by a professional driver on a closed course that included the “wall of death,” an amazing 80-degree banked turn. The speed at which the car took the turn looked incredible. Surely to experience the gravity of that turn in a production car was a once in a lifetime experience.


At the Pit Stop, the German guy they found to greet the teams with Phil looked like a real-life gnome. That was a little creepy. Not as creepy as the Hippies running towards the mat backwards. Particularly since one of those bitches is going commando-style. If I were Phil, I wouldn’t want that ass anywhere near me.

The Jocks maintained their lead, and sadly, my picks to win were eliminated. The Boricuas’s downfall was a lack of sense of direction. Getting lost twice going to the same place is unacceptable in this race. It was the beginning of the end for them. They deserved it. Sadly, I now have to pick another team to win.

Episode Stats and Predictions

Roadblock: Search a field for a hidden gnome. Teams had a 10 in 150 chance of finding the gnome.

Detour: Break It or Slap It. In break it, teams had to break stunt bottles over each other’s heads searching for a clue, using a cuckoo clock as a cue to break the bottle. In slap it, teams had to learn a German knee-slapping folk dance.

Fast Forward: None.

Yield: None.

Pit Stop: Siegestor, Munich, Germany.

Funniest Moment: One of the Hippies exclaiming, “I need a changing room, I am not wearing any underwear!” at the Detour. It is both sick and disturbing that he’s going commando in such a physical race. Sweat on a bare ass is disgusting!

Smartest Play: The Jocks getting on the first plane out of Moscow just ahead of the Nutty Dentist.

Dumbest Play: Wanda getting lost on the way to the Roadblock, not once, but twice. Even dumber was the fact the Pink Hoes were following the Boricuas at the time. Hahaha, the blind leading the blind.

Next Team to Be Eliminated: The Nerds.

Pick to Win: The Jocks.

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