Jocks in First Place

The big story of this episode is that the Pink Hoes and the Jocks “hooked up” during the last Pit Stop. The show didn’t really elaborate, but they did show two peeps, Eric and Danielle, cozying up on a hammock. So, an alliance has been established. We’ll see what happens as the race goes on. It’s a long race and the chances of both of these teams being in the final three are pretty slim.

Ten minutes into the episode, as the Nutty Dentist team left the Pit Stop, Lake snapped on Michelle and told her to “Shut up!” Surely this is an omen of things to come. A breakdown is eminent with these two, I can feel it. They literally got lost leaving the farm because Lake just thought he couldn’t be wrong about how to get back to the highway. Idiot.

The Hippies thought it would be funny to jump out in front of other team cars going into the first task. All I kept thinking was “God, please let at least one of them get hit by a car.” Those Hippies are not funny, but they think they’re funny. That’s the worst kind of hippie. They are acting up for the cameras with their fucking antics and are clearly not naturally funny. It is clear that they must die.


After a zipline task in Brotas, Brazil teams found that they needed to make their way to Moscow, Russia. And of course, all of the teams bunched up onto the same flights even though their buses arrived staggered into the airport.

The Roadblock seemed pretty easy, but the Boricuas managed to waste a bunch of time because Wanda couldn’t dive for the clue. It took her a really long time to do the Roadblock, but since the Pink Hoes forgot their bag, they ended up tied for last place.

The language barrier caused a few teams to opt for the Scour challenge because taxi drivers couldn’t find the trolley park for the Scrub challenge. The taxi drivers probably couldn’t figure out that it was the number eight trolley park and not just any one of the other trolley parks. In contrast, the Scour challenge was at a well-known theatre. This screwed up a bunch of teams. The moral of the story: never underestimate the power of a phrase book.

The Russian doll challenge looked like Chinese water torture. Think about it. There was a 1 in 150 chance of getting a doll with a clue and it took about two minutes to open each doll. Assuming you were really unlucky and had to open 150 dolls, that’s 300 minutes, or 5 hours. It looked pretty stressful.

The coolest part of the leg was that teams made their way to Red Square to find Phil on the mat. Red Square is an awesome place that I would love to see. Unfortunately for the teams this was not a Pit Stop and Phil advised them that the leg continued on. It was alas, a “to be continued” episode. We’ll see if the Jocks can maintain their lead.

Episode Stats and Predictions

Roadblock: Who wants to take the plunge? One team member had to brave the Russian Winter by putting on a bathing suit and jumping into a pool from a 10 meter high dive platform.

Detour: Scrub or Scour. Scrub a Moscow trolley inside and out or scour (search) through 1500 Russian nesting dolls to find 10 microscopic clues.

Fast Forward: None.

Yield: None.

Pit Stop: None. Mat located at Red Square, Moscow, Russia.

Funniest Moment: Yolanda saying that she couldn’t swim AFTER agreeing to “take the plunge.”

Smartest Play: The Jocks messing with the Pink Hoes’ heads so much that they forgot their bag.

Dumbest Play: The Pink Hoes leaving their clue bag with their money and passports at the Roadblock.

Next Team to Be Eliminated: The Nerds.

Pick to Win: The Boricuas.

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