Gay Guys Eliminated

In this first episode of the race, the teams started the race near Denver, Colorado, at the foot of the Rockies, at the Red Rocks Amphitheatre. As far as I can remember, this was the first time that the race has started this far inland. It has typically started in a coastal city, except for the start in Chicago for the last race. Teams immediately made their way to São Paolo, Brazil.

Surprisingly, BJ & Tyler
(the Hippies) got the hole shot out of the start and were able to run to their car in first place. They seemed not too concerned about the altitude as they ran and are in better shape than their looks would have you believe. They
could be sleepers in physical challenges later in the race.

Lake & Michelle (the Nutty Dentist) almost immediately proved why Mississippi gets low reading comprehension scores. Lake decided to stop and make phone reservations for their flight even though the clue explicitly said not to do
so. Lake didn’t even admit he was to blame and said “I was partially responsible for that.” No Lake, you were solely responsible, and you are an idiot.

Danielle & Dani (the Pink Hoes) got an early lead by getting to the airport first only to squander it later in the race. Ray & Yolanda (the Tokens, because there is always one token black team on the race) had a bit of trouble in the Motor Head Detour, but they did manage to finish it. Ray was frustrated because the Brazilian guys were enamored with Yolanda’s big ass. You can tell the cat calls were getting under his skin, but he maintained.

John & Scott (the Gay Guys) were doomed from the start. John supposedly was afraid of flying, which is pretty funny considering that this is a race around the world and you fly everywhere. They were eliminated for other mistakes, but the fear of flying was an omen of things to come.

David & Lori (the Nerds) were in the front of the pack the whole time and did nothing too extraordinary. I think that they are a solid team that will
continue to do well going forward. The same thing could be said of Wanda & Desiree (the Boricuas). However, Wanda tends to be a little emotional and there is a volatility factor that they will have to keep in check if they expect to win. The Boricuas are the best bet for the first all-female winning team.

Fran & Barry (the Old Farts), had trouble with the Motor Head Detour and had to change to Rotor Head midstream, as did the Pink Hoes. Lisa & Joni (the Grandmas) stalled near last place, but showed some spunk to move ahead of the Gay Guys and stay in the race. I don’t expect them to last much longer.

Joseph & Monica (aka Ken & Barbie) were the most forgettable of all the teams. They were consistently in the middle of the pack throughout and made very little mistakes. If they stay consistent they may do better in later legs.

All in all, it was a good start to the race. All of the teams were adequately introduced. The Nutty Dentist showed that he has the potential to snap like a rubber band. I have a feeling he may have a Jonathan & Victoria blowup moment before the race is over. Like I said when the teams were announced, I am rooting for the Boricuas (the Puerto Ricans) and hope that they become the first all-female winners of the race. Stay tuned.

Leg Stats and Predictions

Roadblock: None.

Detour: Rotor Head or Motor Head. Fly in a helicopter to a building in the city of São Paolo to search for a clue or build a motorcycle from parts at a motorcycle shop.

Fast Forward: None

Yield: None.

Pit Stop: Estádio Municipal Paulo Machado de Carvalho (Pacaembu), São Paolo, Brazil.

Funniest Moment: Tie – Eric & Jeremy (the Jocks) exclaiming “the hoes just passed us” when the Pink Hoes passed them and the Hippies saying, “Can we call you Team Double-D?” when they introduced themselves.

Smartest Play: None.

Dumbest Play: Lake not reading the first clue and stopping to make phone reservations for the flight.

Balls of the Week: John, one of the Gay Guys, flying in a helicopter even though he’s afraid of flying. They seemed to be pretty entertaining, but then again, all the gay teams are. It’s a shame that they were eliminated first.

Next Team to Be Eliminated: The Grandmas.

Pick to Win: The Boricuas.


  1. Y’know, the whole “bitchy gay team” thing is really pandering. I give the reality TV shows props for breaking a lot of ground with showing openly gay people to a broad audience (going back to “Real World San Francisco”), but at this point, it’s like “Okay, bring on the stereotypes!”

    #1 by Larry O’Brien — March 1, 2006 @ 3:55 pm

  2. Yolanda doesn’t have a big ass. She F’in rocked on the detour. She was the one who put the motorcycle together.

    David & Lori are not smart enough to be Geeks. At best they are Nerds, if not Tools. There is a difference.

    I’d say that about half of my gay friends and aquaintances are the bitchy type, so the “Gay Team” in the race is pretty representative of the gay men I know. John was bitchy and Scott was not.

    “Gay Team”….they should make a TV show based on the “A Team”! doot! doo dooooo, Doo dooo dooooooo [Insert A Team theme sone here].

    #2 by Meerenai — March 1, 2006 @ 5:09 pm

  3. I totally agree that David & Lori are nerds, not geeks, and have made changes to the posting to reflect that.

    Also I disagree. Yolanda does have a big bubbalicious ass that the Brazilian men were getting all hot and bothered about. And yes, I agree she rocked that Detour.

    The Gay Teams are all a little different. Team Guido was different from Team Prada (the guys that used the concierge services everywhere) who was different from Reichen and Chip (the military gays) and so on. All of the gay teams have had their own personality, and I don’t agree that all of them were bitchy. I think if they really want to start some fireworks they should get two gay teams into one race. The dynamic of the race could change dramatically with four gay guys instead of two. Anyway, that’s my two cents.

    #3 by Nugget — March 1, 2006 @ 5:53 pm

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