James Brown Booking Photo

James Brown was arrested today in his home state of South Carolina on domestic violence charges. Apparently papa’s got a brand new bag–gettin’ his ass arrested! But seriously, James Brown is no stranger to the big house. He spent over two years in prison in the late eighties on drug and assault charges. Damn, James is 70, he shouldn’t be in jail at this age.

By the way, why is it that James looks like an oversized troll doll? Actually, now that I think about it, he looks more like the crazy Zuni Fetish Doll in the classic ABC movie of the week, Trilogy of Terror. That hair is fucking crazy, give the man a comb!

John Kerry Smiling While Grabbing Mark A. Popp's Ass
Bush Presidential Inaugural, January 20, 2001
John Kerry smiling sheepishly while doing a little ass-grabbin’.

John Kerry won the New Hampshire primary today by a wide margin. However, the win was bittersweet for me thanks to the picture above. The fact that he even posed for a photo op with this loser says that he is a political whore that will do anything for a buck. I don’t see Kerry sticking to his own convictions, but rather swaying his views to suit public opinion. I sure hope I’m wrong, since it looks like he’s headed to a Democratic nomination. Stay tuned.

4 Stars

“I think when Michael looks in the mirror he says, how the fuck did I do this to myself!”
–Donald Trump, February 2003

Everyone knows that I became a huge Donald Trump fan this February when he exclaimed the quote above in the Michael Jackson Unmasked news special. Well now he has his own television show, The Apprentice, and thanks to the power of Tivo I saw the first three episodes yesterday–they were awsome. A truly amazing look at group dynamics.

Donald Trump has divided a team of 16 job candidates into two teams of eight–men against women–in a show format that can best be described as a “Survivor Interview.” The only difference is that the tribe doesn’t kick you off the island. If you goof up The Donald simply fires your ass!

The first three episodes saw the men’s team lose three straight times partly because of their inability to work as a team and partly because the women have been able to use sex appeal in their challenges. Unfortunately, the one breakout character of the show, Sam Solovey, was fired at the end of the third show. He was a strange guy that didn’t know how to make friends and deserved to be kicked off for disrupting the team, but he was fun to watch!

Hopefully, his departure will inspire one of the remaining candidates to “step up” and fill the void. One thing that doesn’t disappoint, Donald Trump firing mofos in his board room–that alone is worth the price of admission.

With all of the craziness of purchasing our new home I had forgotten it was my birthday. I only remembered early this morning (or really late last night) when Mama wished me a “Happy Birthday!” I can’t believe it slipped my mind! It’s actually really hard to forget my birthday, since I share my birthday with the Martin Luther King, Jr. holiday. Dr. King was actually born on January 15th though.

“How much can you know about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight?”
–Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt), Fight Club, 1999

Fight Club, the movie with Brad Pitt and Ed Norton, is one of my favorite films. I mean, people were signing up to beat the crap out of each other! So you can imagine my surprise when I saw this investigative article in the Chronicle about San Francisco’s real-life fight club.

Amazingly, according to the city attorney’s office, other than a place of assembly permit that would “most likely” be required, a “pugilistic contest” statute from 1872 would only require gloves for fighters over 145 pounds and put limits on the number of rounds in any fight. Also, as far as the cops know, there’s no provision on the books prohibiting a fight club, and the Fight Club SF has never been raided. The story doesn’t state how long the fight club has been in operation.

In an unscrupulous attempt to wield incredible power and enslave the minions of Earth, Microsoft sued a 17-year-old Canadian kid named Mike Rowe for registering his own domain name, mikerowesoft.com. When confronted by the press Bill Gates offered this explanation, “Our domain, Microsoft, was forged in the depths of Mt. Rainier, and we were assured by the elves–or was it the lawyers, I can’t remember–that we had ‘one domain to rule them all.’ Besides, there’s nothing funnier than crying Canadians!” Oh, hell no! That’s bullshit! I would love for this kid to win the lawsuit and would donate to his cause, if he ever gets his website back up.

So, our offer has been accepted and we’re in escrow right now for our new place! Here’s the general location: 2 1/2 blocks from the Sony Metreon and Yerba Buena Park, 3 1/2 blocks from the SFMOMA, 6 1/2 blocks from Union Square, 6 blocks from PacBell Park, 2 blocks from the brand new Whole Foods market at Harrison and Fourth Streets, and best of all, it’s 5 1/2 blocks from my firm’s new offices at 55 Second Street.

It is a 1200 sq. ft., 1Bd/1.5Ba two-level loft with stainless steel kitchen appliances, washer/dryer, hardwood over concrete floors, fireplace, 20-foot ceilings with skylights, and a common roof deck with amazing city views.

Here are some pictures of the place–we’re very excited!

Exterior

Living Room

Dining Room, Kitchen in Background

Living Room Fireplace

Living Room

Bedroom

Bathroom

Well, Mama and I finally decided to get into the San Francisco real estate market. We’ve decided to buy a loft in the South of Market district, somewhere near the Metreon. I’ll tell you, there’s nothing more stressful than trying to find a house, or in our case, a condo. We’re putting in our first offer later today, so wish us luck and keep your fingers crossed.

Well, still no news regarding the offer on the condo we want. We are supposed to hear by end of business tomorrow. I started to think back at the first time I saw the city of San Francisco, and I realized that I first saw it on film–a 1984 romantic comedy titled Electric Dreams (Windows Media Trailer, 5MB). It’s a cheesy movie, but I loved it when I was 12. Come to think of it, the movie inspired me to buy a home computer, an Atari 1200XL. Ah, the 80s were fun. Anyway, I’m rambling. Bottom line–no news until Thursday afternoon.

Remember Dubya’s henchmen and henchwomen in Florida? Recent investigations finally prove that Katherine Harris effectively fixed the Florida Presidential election, but she’s a congresswoman now. What is up with that!? Even more scary is that she is contemplating on running for the U.S. Senate. Stay tuned.

Crews took down the PACIFIC BELL sign off PacBell Park today and will be installing a new sign reflecting the park’s new name next month. It was a sad day as many watched the letters come down, but slowly and surely they all did. The park will sit “naked” for one month until the new “SBC” sign, which has letters that are two feet taller, is installed. I am sure people will call it PacBell Park for decades to come, since nobody calls Candlestick by its real name, 3Com Park. All this name changing sucks ass!

After over 14 years of straight up lying and denial, Pete Rose has finally come clean and admitted to betting on baseball. Remember over four years ago, when Jim Gray attempted to get a confesion out of Pete Rose at the All-Century Team event before Game 2 of the 1999 World Series? Rose refused to budge from his lame “I didn’t do it” stance.

Here’s a full text of the interview with comments for reference:

Gray: Pete, congratulations, it was quite an ovation.

Rose: Heart-stopping.

Gray: Pete, let me ask you now. It seems as though that there is an opening. The American public is very forgiving. Are you willing to show contrition, admit that you bet on baseball and make some sort of apology to that effect?

Rose: No, no, Jim, not at all. I’m not going to admit to something that didn’t happen. I know you get tired of hearing me say that, but I appreciate the ovation. I appreciate the American fans voting me on that All-Century team. I’m just a small part of a big deal tonight.

[Commentary: Rose falls back on the same stock answer he’s stated to every reporter for 10 years. Gray, fearless, asks the tough follow-up to try to get a different response from Rose.]

Gray: With the overwhelming evidence that is in that report, why not make that step with this opening…

Rose (interrupting): It’s too much of a festive a night to worry about that. I don’t know what evidence you’re talking about. I mean, show it to me.”

Gray: Well, the Dowd report says, but we don’t want to debate that, Pete.

Rose: Well, why not? Why do we want to believe everything he says?

[Commentary: Ah, this was Rose’s mistake. He challenged Jim Gray, who will not back down–he’s like a fucking pitbull. Remember the Tyson interview, where even though he knew the man could kill him he asked him why he bit Hollyfield not once, not twice, but three times! Here comes the beatdown…]

Gray: You signed a paper acknowledging the ban. Why did you sign it if you didn’t agree with it?

Rose: It also says I can apply for reinstatement after one year, if you remember correctly. In the press conference, as a matter of fact, my statement was I can’t wait for my little girl to be a year old so I can apply for reinstatement. At my press conference. So you forgot to add that clause that was in there.

Gray: Well, you have reapplied. You’ve applied for reinstatment in 1997. Have you heard back from Commissioner Selig?

Rose: No, and that kind of surprises me. It’s only been two years, though, and he’s got a lot of things on his mind. But I hope to some day.

Gray: Pete, it’s been 10 years since you’ve been allowed on the field. Obviously, the approach that you have taken has not worked. Why not, at this point, take a different approach?

Rose: Well, when you say it hadn’t worked, what do you exactly mean?

Gray: You’re not allowed in baseball. You’re not allowed to earn a living in the game you love. And you’re not allowed to be in the Hall of Fame.

Rose: Well, I took that approach and that was to apply for reinstatement. I hope Bud Selig considers that and gives me an opportunity. I won’t need a third chance. All I need is a second chance.

Gray: Pete, those who will hear this tonight will say that you have been your own worst enemy and continue to be. How do you respond to that?

Rose: In what way are you talking about?

Gray: By not acknowledging what seems to be overwhelming evidence.

Rose: Yeh, I’m surprised you’re bombarding me like this. I mean I’m doing an interview with you on a great night, a great occasion, a great ovation. Everybody seems to be in a good mood, and you’re bringing up something that happened 10 years ago.

Gray: I bring it up because I think people would like to see you get it on. Pete, we got to go, we’ve got a game…

Rose: This is a prosecutor’s brief. It’s not an interview, and I’m very surprised at you. I am, really.

Gray: Well, Some would be surprised that you didn’t take the opportunity. Let’s go…[End]

Jim Gray should feel pretty happy with himself for the interview and Pete Rose should be completely red-faced at his behavior over the last 14 years. Clearly, Jim Gray could have been a little nicer to Pete during the interview, but then fans would have been pissed that he was a little soft on him. Pete Rose commanded respect from everyone who saw him play and does deserve to be in the Hall of Fame, but he should have come clean then not now.

Well, not live really, but with a 9-minute delay. The NASA Mars Exploration Rover Spirit rover landed on Mars yesterday afternoon and started to broadcast images from the surface of the Red Planet. Not since the 1997 Mars Pathfinder mission have space enthusiasts been so excited. The black and white pictures that the rover has sent are stunning, but the ones that the rover will begin to take tomorrow will have fourteen times the resolution and will be in vivid color. The rover is expected to survey the Martian landscape for 90 days so the next three months should be very interesting. Big ups to NASA and JPL for getting it there!

Steve Irwin, the world famous crocodile hunter, drew outrage yesterday for feeding a crocodile with one hand while holding his one-month-old son in the other. The croc feeding incident is being compared with Michael Jackson’s baby dangling incident in Germany. This guy is a fucking loon! Isn’t it painfully obvious? Anyway, the authorities paid him a visit for the stunt, but he won’t be charged.

World's Largest Snake, Associated Press

The world’s largest snake was caught in Indonesia a few days ago. Indonesian villagers caught a 49-foot, 983 pound reticulated python and it is in captivity at a primitive zoo in Curugsewu village in the country’s main island of Java. Wow!

Update: According to Snopes, and many others, this story is false.

A lot of bills became law in California as of the first of the year, including domestic partner rights, social security identification at univesities, and anti-spam provisions. Check out the full list of laws in this article.

Well, the new year is here and it has brought a lot of rain to the Bay Area. It is very wet and very cold, dropping into the thirties at night. This morning it was raining so hard that we thought the windows would break. And we live in the city, I could only imagine what it was like in Marin. The good news from all this? This storm is supposed to dump at least five feet of snow in Tahoe, which means awesome snowboarding next week!