I am trying to write four essays that I have to do for school–busy. Nothing else to really post.

I just saw a Biography Channel investigative report on scientology and was shocked to find out that scientology is a UFO cult: a trademarked religion, invented by a washed up science fiction writer. It is described as an elaborate international scam to part fools from their money.

Check out this crazy summary of “Operating Thetan Level 3 (OT III),” the third level of the scientology’s “bridge to freedom.” L. Ron Hubbard wasn’t very original when he wrote this, seemingly borrowing the concept of a “Galactic Federation” while watching Star Trek back in 1968. By the looks of it he was also smoking a big fat doobie. Check out this scholarly breakdown of the text.

Scarier than the science fiction tie-in is that Hubbard has documented connections to Aleister Crowley, a satanic leader who claimed to be the anti-christ in the mid-1940s. I think the celebrities that believe in this shit are a little nuts. Get more information about the scientology from Xenu.net and draw your own conclusions.

I am taking a break from The Daily Nugget for a couple of days to eat, drink, and be merry. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

Mark Fiore is a San Francisco-based cartoonist. He came up with this great cartoon for SF Gate about America’s Homeland Security called Total Information Awareness. Pretty funny–check it out.

It seems that everyone I know is using Instant Messaging (IM). Unfortunately, not everyone is using the same client, which makes communicating difficult. There are special clients like Trillian out there that allow you to login to Yahoo, AIM, ICQ, and MSN all at once. However, the Trillian client is not as robust as the individual IM clients. Which IM client do you use?

This film captures the magic of Motown and gives a behind-the-music-like account on how some of the greatest Motown hits were made from the horse’s mouth–the musicians that created the hits, The Funk Brothers. In one of the best scenes of the movie, the Funk Brothers recall how they came up with “Heard it Through the Grapevine” at a table with Joan Osborne–it is spine-tingling. The movie was beautifully shot and recorded, featuring breathtaking live performances by the surviving Funk Brothers. Sadly, Johnny Griffith passed away on November 10th, before the film was released. Check it out–it’s excellent.

I went on a 35-mile bike ride today around the city of San Francisco. It was a counter-clockwise loop starting at the Ferry Plaza around the edge of the city. The route that we took is outlined on this map. Actually it wasn’t that bad, it only took three and a half hours of riding time. We stopped to eat at Westlake so the total time was four hours and twenty minutes. That’s a long time to be sitting on the saddle.

I was raised as a typical 80s latch key kid in Southern California. Needless to say, I watched a lot of television as advertisers were discovering television as a medium to promote commercialism during an era of rampant inflation and Reaganomics.

As I watched Voltron and Scooby Doo, the most memorable commercial jingle of the time was “Pete Ellis Dodge, Long Beach Freeway, Firestone Exit, Southgate.” It haunts me to this very day, “and that’s the truth.” Pete Ellis did really well from these commercials–he eventually founded Autobytel.com.

Cal Worthington also had great commercials in which he came out with a circus animal and was introduced by the announcer as “Cal Worthington and his dog, spot. If you need a car or truck go see Cal.” The commercials also would say “pussy cow” instead of “go see Cal” sometimes to make the commercials more memmorable–it worked. I would hear the jingle and laugh like Beavis and Butthead uncontrollably, “Huh, huh, huh, he said pussy.” Those were the days.

Does anyone else remember these commercials at random as they go about their their daily lives–or is it just me?

A scientist burnt his penis with a hot laptop. He remembered feeling a burning sensation after he had been writing a report at home for about an hour with the computer on his lap. Apparently, the smoke from between his legs wasn’t enough of a clue.

A businessman mistakenly displayed a picture of a nude boy in front of co-workers while attempting to open another document during a PowerPoint presentation. A full investigation by the authorities later found child pornography all over the guy’s computer and desk. Adding insult to injury, this guy was an ex-pastor at a church. I am telling you–you can’t make this stuff up!

The latest survey conducted by the National Geographic Society showed that 11% of Americans between the ages of 18-24 cannot find the United States on a global map! Check out the rest of the statistics below:

87% cannot find Iraq
83% cannot find Afghanistan
76% cannot find Saudi Arabia
70% cannot find New Jersey
49% cannot find New York

What the fuck!? I am so disappointed. What, if anything, are children learning in grammar school and high school? I understand that this country’s culture thrives on isolation and an “ignorance is bliss” mentality but these numbers are just downright shocking. This isn’t ignorance, it’s stupidity. You would think that with the popularity of the Sopranos that more people would be able to find New Jersey. Thinking globally, Americans are idiots–the numbers don’t lie. Something needs to change.

Another interesting fact discovered by the survey is that Swedish people are not only gorgeous, they are bright too. They scored the highest, identifying 13 of 16 countries on the average–apparently there are no “dumb blondes” in Sweden, just here.

I added a Zonkboard message board to the sidebar of The Daily Nugget that will allow users to post general comments about pretty much anything. Or as my friend J-Nort would say, “Shiznit for the peeps to tho up crazy shizzle on da Internizzle.”

This of course is separate from the ability of posting a comment on the actual blog entries. The message board will simply keep the last 25 messages for review and allows users to post some of their own “Internet Graffiti.” Check it out (on the right) and post a comment.

Michael Jackson has been all over the news lately, culminating with yesterday’s bizarre baby dangling incident. So I have to ask what is MJ’s biggest problem–there’s a myriad of items to choose from.

Michael Jackson was waving his son over the balcony railing of a German hotel yesterday. Witnesses say that MJ appeared to be over-excited and out of control before waving the child over the railing. We know he looks pretty damn strange (see earlier blog) and is a little nuts naming two of his kids Prince Michael and Prince Michael II. Fankly, I am not surprised.

I am so tired of people asking me what the name of my firm is. Most receptionists think I am from a radio station there to interview one of their executives. Others may be a bit more informed, assume that I am part of the consulting firm (now Bearing Point), and ask me how I like the “new name change.” Wrong–turn off your radio! It’s all about the partnership, baby!

An oil tanker carrying 20 million gallons of oil sank off the coast of Spain today. That amount of oil is twice the amount that was carried by the Exxon Valdez. Officials hope that the oil tanks do not rupture as the ship sinks 11,800 feet to the ocean floor.

The U.S. Intelligence has confirmed that the audio tape released by Al Jazeera last week is indeed Osama Bin Laden. The question remains though–why an audio tape? Bin Laden is not camera shy by any stretch of the imagination. Some speculate he’s had plastic surgery (like Michael Jackson, see previous blog) and others think he is too injured to do a camera shoot. Whatever the reason though, this can’t be good for America.

You know, I saw a picture of Michael Jackson a few days ago and was a bit disturbed. MJ has taken the plastic surgery thing a little too far–he doesn’t even have a nose any more. It’s sad. Here’e the history of MJ’s face for reference.

Mickey Mouse was found drawn on a fresco in an Austrian church built in 1300. Is Mickey a medieval symbol for an evil spirit that would someday attempt to take over the world? Nah, that spirit would be Michael Eisner, who between 1996 and 2001 made over $737MM.

I overheard some people on the train this morning talking about the hottest stage show in the city right now, Puppetry of the Penis. What is the world coming to when some goobers can get on a stage, manipulate themselves, and gain an audience? Puppetry!? I remember when they called it masturbation. By the way, when I lived in Los Angeles and Melissa lived here in San Francisco, I was one hell of a puppeteer.